Late Night Rambling

pandorascock: That one chump with his ninetails Look how...

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 00:38:50 -0700

pandorascock:

That one chump with his ninetails

Look how protective my Ninetales is of me.

What uni do you go to?

Thu, 14 Mar 2013 00:50:06 -0700

I went to University of Arizona.

You make pretty writing :) What do you major in?

Sun, 24 Feb 2013 03:55:39 -0700

Why thank you, Anon. While I haven’t kept up on it recently I’m grateful people still enjoy it. I actually majored in Pre-Med/Pre-vet and I only took a few courses in writing, though I wish now I had taken more.

Wolf Operated Human Ball Mode

Mon, 03 Dec 2012 22:38:00 -0700

Also titled: My Last D&D Session.

Let me start with a little background. I was with a Barbarian, and Cleric. Myself being a Ranger, had a wolf companion, and we ended up on a ship with hallways that were fairly narrow. Upon climbing a set of stairs to the upper deck, we saw multiple armed men attacking our ship. In an attempt to bottle neck them in the lower narrow pathways we took back downstairs, only to find our path was now blocked by more armed me. The Barbarian, named Captain Billy Stinkwater, decided he would charge them at what he calls “Ramming speed” in attempt to bulldoze them over. A meager 12 roll proved unsuccessful. I attempted to strengthen his charge with the Cleric, Kael, but a low roll on Kael’s part left us tripping down the stairs with my wolf following behind. With no other options left, I shouted out to form a human ball using a reflex save to mold into it. The following occurred.

Me: Just roll to see if we can combine into a human ball with my wolf on top, there is no loss to this we are already fucked and tripping down stairs!

Captain: Fine.

Kael: Fine

DM: Hahaha good luck

Captain: True 20!

Kael: 19!

Me: 18 for me, 19 for my wolf before adding bonus’

DM: Christ…. Let me figure this out.

Me: I can’t believe that might work. We could just roll all them over and take a point safely, taking them one by one!

Keal: As long as I’m in the middle I can heal everyone.

Me: Let’s just see how the human ball goes.

(Outside the game Captain grabs his laptop to turn on Limp Bizcut’s “Rolling”)

Me: Roll to see if mid roll I start a chorus of might with this song.

DM: Fine I’m still trying to figure out th-

Me: TRUE 20

DM: Oh god.

All three of us join in harmony to belt out the song as the DM attempts to figure out how to handle all of this.

DM: Okay, okay. Here it goes. As you start tumbling down the stairs due to the Cleric tripping you, somehow by some ungodly power you all manage to grab hold one another. Formin into a ball bounding down the stairs, with a wolf running on top operating it all.

Me: DON’T FORGET THE CHORUS OF MIGHT!

DM: Right, chanting a horrifying melody instilling fear into the armed men.

DM makes a few hidden rolls and starts again.

DM: Okay, you barrel down the first four opponents and leave them unarmed on the floor, but there are more than you expected and those behind ready with weapons drawn to a horrifying ball of human bodies and deathly sounds. Roll to make your dismounts.

Captain: True 16

Kael: True 14

Me: True 18, what do you want us adding to this, Reflex save?

DM: Sure.

Captain: Don’t forget about Wolfzies!

Me: Right, let me do tha- 20!

DM: Jesus. Okay roll again.

Me: 20 again!

DM: God, okay roll again.

Me: True 17

DM: Okay, you two make a very sloppy dismount and become a tad disoriented, Thelus, you keep your bearings and land posed, ready for combat. As for your Wolf, somehow it gains all the momentum from the toppling and uses it to launch forward into the first man, immediately decapitating him, continuing on to the next one latching onto his neck.

Me: Wolf Operated Human Ball mode success.

Laughing and cheers were had all around. Come to find out, they weren’t even invading the ship for us, they were capturing the real captain of the ship. That’s not what’s important though. We formed a successful human ball with a wolf running on top, and my wolf decapitated someone.

Melted Cheese

Sun, 18 Nov 2012 04:00:10 -0700

Is it odd that I’m reminded of you by the smallest of things already? Take for example, when I go to shower when I wake up. I’ve mistakenly grabbed two towels for the both of us only to realize I’m alone. Or how on these now cold nights on my drive home with my windows down, I can smell distant fireplaces being used. I’m then brought back to us falling asleep in front of my fireplace as you tickle my back and I drift into sleep. Though, probably more than anything, you make your appearance the most when I get home at night. As I prepare myself an awesome meal, you know, one consisting of me melting cheese over something. Because that’s the extent of my cooking prowess. I remember the first time you had me help you cook, and how happy I was to do so. No matter how utterly horrible I am at doing so. So at night when I’m waiting for the microwave to melt cheese over stale chips, I want nothing more than to be with you preparing one of our ludicrous 3am snacks that toes the line of unhealthy. Because honeybunch, I want nothing more than to be with you.

deadpanawesome: When I wrote this song, it meant a lot to me...

Tue, 06 Nov 2012 01:00:47 -0700

deadpanawesome:

When I wrote this song, it meant a lot to me and it meant a lot to my friends and I guess it was celebrating some things that when you’re young you celebrate and uh… I’m getting older now and I don’t know if I would celebrate these things as much as uh, I did I guess. I realize how particular a lot of these things are to being young. A lot of the time I don’t feel young anymore. It feels strange to play a song like this.

Hello Old Friend,

Wed, 17 Oct 2012 04:08:00 -0700

Is that a fair way to address you? Old Friend, as if we were kids when we met. True, we were still children when we met; mentally and emotionally speaking. The years haven’t spanned in great number, but do the experiences not make up for that? I am avoiding my true purpose here, my apologies. I know that some feeling is lost over text, but we are both cowards are we not? Plus I’m only as witty as you when I’m able to hide behind a screen. You once wrote one of these to me, and although mine is a tad different I hope the meaning isn’t lost. I know that you feel guilty, or remorseful for actions you have taken. At first I too wanted to blame you, truly I was quite angry. Though it was misplaced, and I’m here to tell you that. I was hiding in my sheltered cove for too long, hibernating away safely. But being safe isn’t the same as being happy. You did have your hand at things, and yes I acted after that push, but that’s what I needed. A push. These flames that are facing me now are terrifying my friend, but I’m willing to brave them. For there sweet reprieve on the other side of them, with promise of something grander. I may be burned, they may scar me, but no one lives life without getting hurt. I believe we have both seen the bottom, that horrifying place we could each call home. You have done more for me than I can express to you. This is not me settling a debt, or making things even like I usually do. Because that only comes at my convenience. I don’t quite know what you need yet, a push or a hand to hold onto. But I do know that when the time comes, I will be there to outstretch it nonetheless. It matters not what this hand reaches out to do, or into. Just like I am now, I would brave the flames for you and possibly get burned yet again. But chicks dig scars right? And I’m not going to let you face it alone. Just know, I would plunge my arm into that flame, or back into the darkness to pull you out from drowning just like you would do for me, just like you have. Stay golden. Looks like I stole your line Johnny, deal with it.

Something I Previously Refused to Post

Tue, 09 Oct 2012 10:05:00 -0700

Or the Original Title: Shooting the Moon

Do you not see what I see? Is it not as obvious to you as it is so painstakingly obvious to me? There are times in which I want nothing more than to break down and spill it all to you. Humoring the idea, I coerce myself into believing that if I were to simply verbalize these things, light would be shed, and you could see the same path. Dangerous, that’s what you are to me. I toy with the idea of us much like I do that cliff, seeing just how close I can get while still keeping safe. It’s not a winning game, it never is. Though it excites me so, darling like you wouldn’t believe. Improbable at best, those are my odds. It’s a long shot, no one is denying this. Though isn’t that what you’re already doing? Or maybe that is my way of rationalizing the whole idea. You mean more to me than you know, and while I feign the friend out of respect, truth be told I would put money on these odds. I want to be involved in your life, and you in mine, but I’m stricken with fear. If I could just make the plunge, pull that trigger, it’s possible you would see what I see. I don’t enjoy the idea of possibly being crushed, but I will face it anyways. Because you only get one shot at something amazing, and I’ll be dammed if I let fear cripple me. So I will tell you it soon, and I will ask you to make a terribly tough decision. I hope then you see what I see, you see that potential. That you become a safe haven, instead of a source of constant danger. And as I said, I’m not the safe bet, and my odds at winning you aren’t great. Though, no one ever talks about the safe bet. So darling, I’m going to shoot the moon when I see you.

And you tend to pretend that you didn’t always see when I...

Thu, 04 Oct 2012 11:20:00 -0700

And you tend to pretend that you didn’t always see when I psychically said “You should choose me instead.”

Heroes

Wed, 03 Oct 2012 03:19:51 -0700

Heroes:

deadpanawesome:

I play the villain.

I do it better than anyone has before. I’m so convincing to you; to everyone.

I smother you with the right words and make you believe in me. I flatter and compliment. You break down my defenses and find I’m so affable and welcoming when you step into my lair, gun drawn and…

Playing this at every session.

Mon, 24 Sep 2012 01:21:00 -0700

Playing this at every session.

Audio

Sat, 15 Sep 2012 09:59:00 -0700

Photo

Sat, 15 Sep 2012 09:33:00 -0700

Photo

Sat, 15 Sep 2012 09:24:42 -0700

I called my Grandma today.

Sat, 15 Sep 2012 03:38:23 -0700

She was about to go into surgery and I wanted to get to talk to her beforehand. Before I hung up she told me this:

“You know, I don’t have much longer here. But I hope I live long enough to be more like you, Andrew.”

No Grandma, I hope I live long enough to be like you.

Photo

Mon, 10 Sep 2012 20:54:00 -0700

Your cancerous effect still plagues my life, it’s utterly disgusting. I’ve never hated...

Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:34:00 -0700

Your cancerous effect still plagues my life, it’s utterly disgusting. I’ve never hated someone more than you. I wish I never met you.

Photo

Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:14:15 -0700

Leave the Bourbon on the Shelf

Sat, 01 Sep 2012 03:28:23 -0700

Funny, Blue Eyes, how it all worked out for us, isn’t it?

We danced our slow dance for so long. Even when one of us stepped off beat, the other would recover for us and our stride would align once again. I apologized to you once before and truly, darling, I meant it. I wasn’t in it for the long haul, and you were way more into me than you. I knew I had wronged you in that aspect, and we took our time to drift towards one another. But it seemed to me that we would drift back into each others’ embrace. I genuinely thought we would after your birthday. I admit that a few weeks prior I may have seemed distant, and it was nothing short of intentional. You asked me to your place, I was eager to spend the night with you again, but what I wasn’t prepared for was the cancer rearing up again. I know that you don’t know this, and like so many other things you never will; though we’ll get back to that later. But a ruthless dictator of my heart and emotions had contacted me on my way to your place. You know the one, the one I told you I try so hard to forget about. So when I got there I put on my best face, my greatest play. All in hopes of making both of us believe I wasn’t crumbling inside. Maybe the act was too good, or maybe by then you had already decided. I ended up not staying the night. I know I said I would never lie to you but I did that night. I lied right to your face and told you I had to care for a dog that I was watching, which wasn’t true. Maybe you knew that. Truth is, I couldn’t take it. I was physically with you, sure, but mentally I was contaminated and I knew that I couldn’t let that spread. So I left, and I took my time to make sure she wasn’t a factor in what we had. I wanted to make so damn sure that I took extra precautions, extra time. I guess that was my downfall. I put up those walls again to keep the remnants of my past from leaking into our present. Not until I was sure I wanted you, and not just a body next to me did I let those walls down again. Boy did they come crashing down. I could have picked a better time, definitely better words, but I let them all fall in that moment. I mean seriously, who uses the words “Go steady” anymore? I’m digressing. I knew instantly your answer, and after you told me you started to see someone else, I checked out. I don’t remember much after that, not because I started pounding shots for my birthday. Which I was hopefully going to celebrate with you, but because I retreated into the deepest points of my mind. I only remember walking you out and giving you a kiss on the cheek. Then the drinks started flowing. Doubles, one after another until I couldn’t feel a thing. That perfect balance between keeping consciousness and blacking out. That edge that I flirt with so much. Your apology came the next day, explaining to me your reasoning. As if laying it out on the line would aid me. You know better than that, you know me. I guess that was the problem. I brushed it off in my response, trying to act as composed as possible. I hope that came through the way I wanted it to. I didn’t want you to know how torn up I really was, how I am currently. But hey, I guess now Dan has a valid reason for how he feels about you. But you won’t know that. I hope you never know that. I just hope you’re happy, I hope he treats you right. Your blue eyes were meant to shine.

“If I roll a 20 I turn into a zombie instead.” “No, Roger, that’s not how it...

Wed, 29 Aug 2012 02:00:00 -0700

“If I roll a 20 I turn into a zombie instead.”

“No, Roger, that’s not how it works you can’t just turn into a zombie. There aren’t even any necromancers around.”

“No, no, I don’t want to be raised from the dead, I want to be the living dead.”

“Again, you can’t do that, how could you even support that in this campaign?”

“Okay, are you following me?”

“Oh god, fine.”

“So here’s the deal. I listed my character’s background as unknown right? Whenever anyone asked where I had come from I would always say I couldn’t recall. Also remember, I put every point I could into bluff. You still following? Here’s where it gets tricky. So my character actually did know his background, but he kept it hidden from everyone… JUST LIKE HIS RIGHT ARM. Do you ever remember me removing my right arm’s armor? No. That’s because that’s where I was bit, infected have you. I didn’t want anyone to learn the secret my character kept hidden. He only went on this journey to hopefully find a cure, but the wound weakened him and left him to fall in battle. This is totally legit bro, let me roll for it.”

“Fine, roll a d20 and if it’s a 20, you’re now a zombie. I hated your character anyways, 2deep4u cunt.”